While religious ceremonies serve their important role,
about half of all Americans are not formally religious. These people
often request a religious funeral from a church they had a relationship
with in the past; settle for a religious ceremony and deal with hypocritical
feelings, or do without a funeral at all.
Because relating death to religious teachings is only
one purpose of a funeral, many non-religious people these days elect
to hold humanist ceremonies. During humanist ceremonies, as in religious
ceremonies, families and friends gather to acknowledge the death,
offer support to each other, and express their grief. A friend or
family member may preside over the ceremony, or the family may ask
a pastor to conduct a ceremony that avoids religious imagery. Families
who choose a humanist ceremony should ask their funeral director for
assistance.
Humanist ceremonies commonly feature music, group singing
and readings of poetry or literature that held some meaning for the
deceased. In fact, group participation is also becoming more common
during Protestant and Catholic services, which don’t offer as
many informal gatherings as Jewish services.
Grief experts say this participation can be beneficial,
having a unifying effect on the mourners. Participation also helps
people show how much they cared for the person who died, and to reach
out to each other.
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